Sex During
Pregnancy
Questions That
Trouble Pregnant Women:
Will my desire for sex decrease during my pregnancy?
Can
vigorous intercourse harm the baby?
Is it harmful to have orgasm during pregnancy?
How often is it safe to have intercourse during
pregnancy?
Can I have intercourse any time during pregnancy?
I have a history of miscarriage. Must I abstain from
intercourse?
I don’t have pain. But pressure during intercourse
causes me great discomfort.
Is it permissible to douche during pregnancy?
Questions That
Trouble Expectant Fathers:
Also
See:
OB Patient Information:
Sex During
Pregnancy
Return to Frequently Asked Questions Index
Questions That Trouble Pregnant
Women:
Will my desire for sex decrease during my
pregnancy?
No
two women react exactly the same way to pregnancy. In most women,
pregnancy does not have a significant effect on their interest in sex. In
those women for whom birth control was an interruption or psychological
obstacle to complete sexual enjoyment, pregnancy may be a period of
uninhibited, carefree sexual indulgence. At certain times during their
pregnancy, some women feel that they are "losing their figure and looks".
They may shy away from lovemaking because they feel undesirable. Or they
may desire sex more often than usual as reassurance that their partner
still loves them and find them attractive.
Occasionally, there will be a woman
who has distaste for intercourse throughout her pregnancy. It is thought
that this may be related to a conscious or unconscious fear of hurting the
fetus, for the distaste usually disappears after the baby is born.
Can vigorous intercourse harm the baby?
It is
virtually impossible to harm the fetus in the uterus. The fluid it floats
in, the membranes, which contain it, the womb itself, the abdominal wall,
and the bony pelvis all serve to protect the new life from injury.
Is
it harmful to have orgasm during pregnancy?
Not
at all. Orgasm is just as beneficial now as at any other time. Having an
orgasm will make no difference to the baby.
How often is it safe to have intercourse during pregnancy?
There
is no ideal frequency of intercourse and any frequency is safe. Frequency
varies remarkably from couple to couple and from month to month with the
same couple. Some women are disinterested during the first three months
of pregnancy, partly due to fatigue. But they tend to regain their energy
in the fourth month and will often experience a new surge of sexual
feeling.
Can I have intercourse any time during pregnancy?
Generally sexual intercourse is permitted throughout pregnancy.
Intercourse should be discontinued and
your doctor consulted if your water breaks, you have vaginal bleeding,
itching, discharge, experience vaginal or abdominal pain, or you have a
diagnosis of preterm labor.
I
have a history of miscarriage. Must I abstain from intercourse?
It is customary to abstain for the
first three months of your pregnancy. Your doctor will probably also
tell you not to take bumpy car rides or indulge in strenuous physical
activity. This is to give the placenta a chance to develop sufficiently so
that trauma to the uterus will not cause the onset of bleeding or
cramping.
I
don’t have pain. But pressure during intercourse causes me great
discomfort.
If it
is simply your partner's weight that is causing you discomfort, this can
be remedied by changing position. For instance, he may kneel astride you
or approach you from the side or back or you may sit astride him. If you
feel internal pressure, it is wise to avoid deep penetration. Changing
position or using pillows under you to change the angle of entry into the
vagina may help.
It
is very difficult to talk to my partner about the way I feel. I think I
look ugly and undesirable. He never tells me otherwise and he doesn’t
cuddle me anymore.
Occasionally, a few men are physically "turned off" during their wife's
pregnancy. It is only temporary and shouldn't be viewed as rejection.
Your partner's seeming neglect probably has nothing to do with your looks
since the majority of men find their wives most beautiful during this
time. He may have inner anxieties and mixed feelings about his coming
fatherhood that make him seem different. Or you may be unconsciously so
involved with your "inner" life, that you are perhaps somewhat neglectful
of him. Possibly your partner and you just need to talk things out more.
Is
it permissible to douche during pregnancy?
Not
unless specifically prescribed by your doctor.
See Frequently Asked
Questions: Douching for more information.
Questions That Trouble Expectant
Fathers:
I
have a strong need for sex, but since her pregnancy, my partner isn't
interested. It is causing tension between us. What can we do?
As
with other marital disagreements, some form of loving compromise is
probably the healthiest solution. See if you can talk it out with your
partner, and perhaps settle on some lesser frequency or an alternate
method for you that requires less participation on her part.
Remember, too, that it is sometimes
hard for a woman to feel interested in sex when she doesn't feel
desirable. Frequent reassurance from you that she is still beautiful and
loved despite her bulging belly may also help matters.
When I feel the baby moving in my wife’s belly while making love, it puts
an end to my sexual interest.
No
doubt you are unconsciously worried that you might hurt the baby. You
won't. As discussed above, the fetus is well protected, and its kicking
and turning have nothing to do with your sexual activity. However, if you
are still bothered by this, try another position so you don't feel the
baby.
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Questions Index
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